Third time's the charm... Right??

Signed back up for Weight Watchers this weekend. My weigh-in day is Monday, so I feel like I have the weekend to get re acclimated with the program.

I did the online program after having Conner in 2008. It worked really well and I was very excited. When I went back to work, the company I worked for didn't allow personal use of the computers and it was way before I had a smart phone. My interest faded as I couldn't track during the day and my momentum came to a screeching halt. I ended my membership and tried to employ what I had learned.

After my second child was born, I had gained a LOT of weight due to the bed rest I was on because of a difficult pregnancy. A very close friend and I joined WW again, but this time we went to the classes instead of doing the online program.

I don't enjoy group activities. I'm not a "joiner". But I love Amber and I wanted to have and give the support, so off we went to meetings. They were fun! I was pleasantly surprised! This was the year they introduced Points Plus, so we were both learning a new system. She had used the "Simply Filling" program before, and I had started when "Momentum" was the standard.

My husband saw the success we were having and he joined with us. He went to a different meeting than I did so we could alternate who stayed home with the kids. We even walked our first 5-K during this time. It was pretty cool. But, the excuses came easily and quickly and soon I wasn't going to meetings anymore. Once again I canceled my membership and went back to my old ways of eating.

I'm doing some job-hunting and needed a nice outfit for interviewing. When I went to the store, I discovered the need to buy size 20 pants, and shirts from the "Women's" section. I was so sad and disappointed with myself. I avoid social activities and even family gatherings because of my weight.

So. Here I am again. Facing this battle and addressing my need and want to be healthy, happy, and thin.

Wish me luck. I've got about 80 pounds to loose, and if I can manage the 2-pound weight loss per week that's recommended, it will take somewhere in the 40 week mark at the earliest before I see my goal, so we're looking at next January for a reasonable "best-case-scenario". I have to keep that in mind! I'll want it to instantly vanish, so I have to train my thinking into knowing and understanding that this will take a LONG TIME. This weight has been slowly added over 5 years. Fully understanding and coming to grips with a slow loss is key.

To put it in terms that I "get", I can't eat raw meat. I have no problem waiting for it to cook. I need to wait for this too. I can't have produce the day I plant a seed. I have no problem cultivating, carrying for, and nurturing the growth to get a healthy and fruitful crop. I need to learn to see my body in that same way.

Cook well my friends.