Square One... It's like I never left you.

Those of you that follow along regularly know that I have been battling my weight for a long time. I started a "Game On" challenge with friends via Facebook, and found a wonderful circle of people who help motivate me, encourage me, and support me. That being said, they can't physically be with me 24/7 to both monitor and control what I eat and do. I exercised 180 minutes last week, I counted every calorie, and every carbohydrate. I was below calories and carbs for the first half of the week, and lost 4 pounds like THAT (snap of fingers of emphasis). Then I had enough calories left over after a long workout and not eating very high caloric foods during the day to eat gluten free pizza for supper. It was dreamy. Warm, crunchy, salty, tangy, cheesy. Oh, man, was it just awesome. 

But... The next day, I was in agony. Must have gotten cross contaminated, because I was dreaming of trying to find a restroom, then woke up before 6:00am with terrible tummy troubles.  I spend 90% of the next day (Saturday) in bed. But I got up to eat. I mean, I am ad addict. I needed that food fix, needed to see if eating would make me feel better. Nope. Not even a little bit. 

But, around 4:00pm, I was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, so I joined the family and planned a "comfort meal" of mild chicken and rice and peas for supper. Made it, it was fabulous, ate it, and enjoyed some time with the family. The kids eagerly and sweetly exclaimed that this was the best meal ever, lifting my spirits higher and higher. 

Then I noticed the next morning that 2 of my lost 4 pounds had found its way back home. I hadn't lost them, but merely misplaced them. 

Sunday was my official "cheat day" and we had a full day of relaxing and fun planned. A day-trip to a winery with friends, and a baseball game that night. Cheese and crackers with the wine, then gluten free hotdogs and gluten free beer at the game. It really was a great day!

Monday morning, today, this morning, I got on the scale to see what was going on, and the other 2 lost pounds had rejoined their comrades on my thighs. It's a good thing too, because one side was horribly lopsided with those 2 extra pounds. I was way off balance, walking almost in circles, it was a little embarrassing. It's a blessing really that the other 2 came back.

The blessing is this. I know that I can not eat carbohydrates that do not come from leafy green vegetables. The ONLY carbohydrate that my body can process and not immediately store as fat is leafy greens.  

So here we are, back to a Monday morning start of a week. I'm thinking no cheats, other than perhaps a gigantic steak. But as far as cheats... I'm only cheating myself. I'm not sneaking something by the diet police, looking over my shoulder and laughing at the fact that I got away with it. "Ha Ha! You SUCKER!  I just ate a plate of brown rice, and you didn't catch me! Fools!"  Yeah... Um... They did catch me. Well, the scale caught me, and I'm feeling like the fool. 

Time to wake up Chica. You know what to do, and it's way past time to stop being so hard headed about all this. There is no magic bullet, no easy way out, no miracle "plan" that will fix all of this. You ate your way here, you can eat your way out. Just do it and shut up, already.

Game on, y'all.

Day 4

Day 4 was cool because I used one of those diet tips I've heard about and always thought was hooey. Around 3:00 I was "STARVING"! I logged the snack I wanted to have, Greek yogurt and granola, and it was around 300 calories! For a "healthy" snack, that is "chock-full of protein and whole grains which fill you up and make you feel great all day". Bologna!!  Pure bologna. No. What fills me up and makes ME feel great all day is a cheeseburger and fries. 

So while I was contemplating my choices, I thought about the HALT method.  "H" - Am I HUNGRY? = YES! "A" - Am I ANGRY? = YES, because I want a cheeseburger. "L" - Am I lonely? = NO, I have 2 kids, 2 dogs, a cat and Facebook to keep me company. "T" - Am I THIRSTY?  = Hum... Could be. Lets drink a bunch of water to see if it really does "fill you up" when you're feeling snackish. 

Well, I'll be damned! It worked. I drank around 16 ounces of water with lemon, and I didn't even have to get up. I had my water bottle already with me. Here's my food log from day 4. 

I then proceeded to pack up the kids and (almost) all their supplies for swimming class. I let the dog out, and we went to class. 

Swim class was fun. GG "graduated" up to level 3, Boo almost went to level 4, but needs to enter the water with a swooping/diving motion from the edge of the pool, rather than dropping in feet first. 

GG got to ring the graduation bell, she didn't force me to come in to remove her from the pool like she has every other class, and we had a moderately tantrum-free suit removal, dry-off, and redressing in street clothes. Right up until I realized I had forgotten a shirt for Boo. Seriously Carter Ann? Seriously?!? Great. Do I have him walk out in just his blue jeans and no shirt and act like its no big deal, do I leave him in his swimsuit, because that's a more socially acceptable shirtless outfit? The whole time he's sassing me to no end because I forgot his shirt. Since he's already in his jeans at this point, I'm not going to put my sweet angel back in his cold wet suit, so I wrapped his top half in his towel, and we walked out like that. 

Just to see that it was POURING outside. And the umbrellas are in the car. And the car is in the far corner of the lot. Seriously? I forgot the shirt, I forgot the umbrellas. Ggrrrr.  

With GG on hip, purse and gigantic pool bag on shoulder, and Boo holding my hand, we run to the car. Boo loses a flip-flop in the parking lot, so we have to go back, put on said flop, and run to car again. I put GG in her seat, Boo crawls through, I shut GG's door, go around to Boo's seat, use the towel to cover my head and back while I buckle him in. I jump into the front seat and start the car. 

Boo is still smart-mouthing me for forgetting his shirt. He's "FREEZING" because he doesn't have his shirt. Note, he's the most dry of the 3 of us because he was wrapped in his towel. I tossed the now wet towel back to him telling him its cold and wet, but he's convinced I'm completely wrong. Then GG wants HER towel. "NO", I said, and I backed out of the parking spot. Got to the stop sign and heard, "Mommy, I'm not buckled." I turn and look, and sure as shit, I didn't buckle GG. 

Put the car in reverse, get out of the way as I can, car in park, jump out, run around, open her door, buckle her in while she's screaming and kicking because she doesn't WANT to be buckled, close her door, run back around car, get back in driver seat, and drive home. 

We walk in the door to find the Daddy person getting out the vacuum. "YOUR DOG ate the trash again." I didn't dare ask what he was using the Dyson for in this case instead of sweeping and mopping. Nope. Don't question at this point. Whatever he's doing is perfect. 

"Stella was outside when I got home too", he says after the vacuum is off. I looked down at the 85 pound collie shepherd chow retriever mixed mutt who is sadly glaring at me through her still wet, very long, very thick fur with eyes that say, "Mommy... You left me outside in the rain and I was so scared you would never come home."

Forgot shirt and umbrellas. Forgot to place trash can in bathroom, forgot to buckle daughter, forgot fuzzy-girl outside. 

Perhaps I should sit down. But no. Instead I'm going to go change out of my soaking wet clothes. 

GG and I change out of our wet clothes into our jammies and bring jammies down for the boys. What's better on a crazy night of the forgetsies than a family movie night in jammies? 

The kids had fish-sticks, veggie-noodle Mac-N-Cheese, grapes, cheese, milk and water. Mommy and Daddy had grilled salmon. We watched The Rise of The Guardians, and forgot all about the rest of the day. 

Day 3

Yesterday was easier than I thought when I started writing in the wee hours of the morning. 

The hardest part of yesterday was deciding what to order from the Chinese take-out/delivery place. My Honey wanted delivery, and I couldn't find the menu for the Italian place that makes the HUGE salads. So we opted for Chinese. I searched my ap for different options and their calorie content, then went to google to check ingredients to be sure what I was picking would most likely be gluten free. 

I chose Moo Shu Pork, and asked for steamed white rice rather than the pancakes. It was VERY good. I didn't eat it all. I could have, and a part of me wanted to! But I realized I wasn't stuffed, nor was I still hungry, so I stopped. There was enough left for a snack later, but I threw it away. I don't HAVE to clean my plate. I don't have to save every bite of leftovers. 

My exercising was pushed back to the kids nap-time, and I LOVED that time alone. I read my book and enjoyed the "quiet". I even rode longer than the 30 minutes because I was so happily enjoying the book and the activity as a whole. 

I am having some abdominal pains as my body gets adjusted to eating differently. I hope this is temporary, and hope its a normal part of this cycle. 

Here's what I ate, drake, and did for exercise yesterday. I didn't add the time playing with the kids, the number of outfit changes they wanted, the dozens of puzzles, markers, crayons, and books I picked up off the floor, and didn't count the vacuuming in my activities. 

 

(Please feel free to take a look at a fellow Mom-Blogger's page. www.TinyStepsMommy.com)