Sweetness

What's a girl to do? White sugar, sugar in the raw, sugar substitute, zero calorie "all natural", honey, agave, aspartame, saccharin, equal, nutra sweet, sweet-n-low, truvia, stevia, stevia in the raw, pure cane, coconut, high fructose corn syrup, JESUS, make it stop. 

Remember when the major world controversy was simply between which beverage had more "sugar"... Coke or Kool-Aid? Moms across America were turning their noses up at one another for making the wrong choice. Oh, the horror!

So what do I offer my friends and family on the rare occasion when a sweet substance is requested as an additive to a food or beverage? Do I designate an entire closet in my home as a sweetener of choice? Of course I know this is silly and ridiculous, and I'm not doing it, but being a southern woman, we're trained from birth to be fabulous hostesses, serve only the best, and to accommodate EVERYONE, so yeah, there is a teeny part of me saying, "You know you need to have all options available. What if one of your friends is unhappy at one of your parties?"

Do I regulate with an iron fist what my own family consumes? Yes, I do 97.3% of the shopping, and 99.7% of the cooking, but I also want my Honey to enjoy his sweet tea, and I myself love a sweet and creamy mug of coffee (or 5) in the morning. 

Next, how do I "know" which report to believe? One day "all natural" is best, one day the zero calorie substitutes are best, one day "sugar is sugar, your body can't tell the difference", one day "this" plant's derivative is better than yesterday's plant derivative. Understandably this is a nerve racking topic. 

I read, I asked friends and family, and I thought I had it narrowed down. Honey, sugar in the raw, and truvia in the raw. I've tried them all in my coffee (not at once, mind you) and I don't like any of them. The one I've heard good things about, and have not yet tried is coconut crystals. I bet Wegmans has them so I'll have to check them out this weekend. Think my Honey will give me a morning kid-free to wander the isles of Wegmans alone?  Here's hoping!  

Painting for Funny Grand Daddy

Here is the painting the kids and I made for my father for Fathers Day. 

The red feet and hands are mine. The black ones are my 4.5 year old son, and the purple ones are those of my 3 year old daughter. 

The technique was exactly like the ones we made for my husband that I wrote about in the earlier post. 

Gluten Free Family

After a few months of abdominal pains, loss of appetite, digestive issues, and having to visit the potty upwards of 10 to 12 times a day, we have a diagnosis of Celiac Disease for my husband that was obtained from a biopsy during a colonoscopy. 

My sister also has Celiac and though my blood tests are negative, I react terribly to gluten. My first colonoscopy will be next year, so ill get the biopsy then, and we'll find out if I also have Celiac, or if I have a very strong Gluten Intolerance of some other kind.

We have two kids who have what's called "chicken skin" on the backs of their arms. I just read the other day that this is an early sign of Celiac in children. Since Celiac is hereditary, the chances that the bumps on our kids arms are in fact indicators that the Mini's have some degree of a gluten sensitivity too is very high. 

So, here we go into a world of being an entire Gluten Free family. We're easing the kids into it though. I'm not a proponent of elimination diets if its not warranted, but on the same token, it's easier to get them use to this lifestyle early. 

The girl is a Mac-n-Cheesr fanatic, and the boy can eat his weight in chicken nuggets and PB&J. Replacing packaged foods laden with gluten with a non-gluten taste-a-like is expensive, so I don't want to go in that direction. 

I love to cook, as I'm sure you've seen, so this won't really be an issue for me, but I will need to gather ideas for things the kids will enjoy and that wont break the bank. I'm going to learn to make kid-friendly meals that I can quickly put together for lunches. It's funny to me that lunch seems to be my Achilles Heel. Breakfast is easy. Eggs or Chex cereal. Dinner is easy too. Meats, veggies, rice. But what do I make for the kids for lunch? I like salads, but they don't. I need ideas.

 

   

Fathers Day Paintings

For Fathers Day this year, we made paintings using our feet and hands. I bought 3 canvases from the craft store. They are 16x20 and $12.99 each. We bought 2. One for Daddy from our 3 year old girl, and one for Daddy from our 4 year old boy. The acrylic craft pain was on sale for $.77 each, so we bought 8, and then an inexpensive set of large brushes and a semi-nice set of smaller art brushes. 

For less than $50.00 we were able to give Daddy a gift that won't be electronically obsolete in a year, out of style in a few years, or wear out ... EVER. It's a marker of childhood with their little hands and feet set in immortality. It was fun for us to make together, the kids picked their colors, and though it was so cool when they were done. 

I did the painting in the kitchen for easy cleanup. I debated the kids bathroom, but the kitchen was MUCH easier, and looking back, I'm VERY happy with the kitchen choice. 

I did one at a time so I didn't have to keep 4 paint covered feet and 4 paint covered hands still and off walls, floors, cabinets, and each other. 

I put each kid on the island and used paper plates to squirt the paint into. I used the large flat brush to paint their feet green, then pressed them onto the canvas to make the leaves for the flower. Then I painted their hands with the 2 colors they wanted for their flowers and they spread their fingers wide and made the handprint flowers. Then I painted different colors on their feet with the green still on, and put their feet on to make the butterfly.  

Then I simply picked up the paint-covered child and sat her/him on the counter next to the kitchen sink, and washed their hands and feet in the kitchen sink. Dried them off, and sent them out to play while I finished the details. 

I used a wine cork dipped in black for the butterfly heads, and used the craft paint brushes to paint the stems on the flowers and the body's on the butterflies. The grass was brushed on one and just squirted on the other. 

Like I said before, it was a lot of fun to make. I think they turned out beautifully. Daddy LOVES them, and they'll never be out of style or become obsolete. 

Check Please.

I'm a check-list girl. I'm also a procrastinator, and I don't like being told what to do. But for some reason, if I make my checklist, I'm much better about getting it done. 

This started at my first real big-girl job, where I was running the financials and HR and all other office work for a restaurant. My boss wanted me to use a check list because there were about a thousand little tasks that all needed to be done and with my ADD, it was hard for me to keep on task. Even while taking my Ritalin, there were still times it was hard for me. When he suggested I use the check list I was annoyed. I've got SO MUCH to do, I don't have TIME to stop, highlight what I've done, and then go do another project. After several weeks of head-butting and stubbornness, he won. And I learned that the checklists took a lot of the *fog* out of my day. A large part of my panicky stress about my day and week was lifted with this simple checklist. It honestly acted like a map for me. 

Now that I'm running the business of a family, I find that I once again need a checklist. I think this will help me stay focused, not get overwhelmed, and not let things pile up. 

And, oh, how I do LOVE organizing things. So the thought of sitting down for a few hours and planning the activities and actions of the members of this organization is as relaxing to me as a day at the spa. Maybe more so, because a day at the spa would make me feel guilty and I'd start to dread the pile of work awaiting me when I got home. 

So today I shall create an organizational schedule. I'll write a mission statement, a financial plan, and delegate tasks according to skill level, ability, and degree of potty training and napping needs. 

No lie, I'm super excited!!

Cucumber Salad

2 fresh whole cucumbers, peeled, semi-seeded, chopped, and lightly salted. 

2 Tablespoons roasted garlic aioli. 

Mix above in bowl and then eat it. 

I used a jarred aioli because I had it. Easy to make though... I'll play with recipes later and post them. 

Motiva... Whatever.

🎶 Where oh where has my motivation gone, oh where oh where can it be? 🎶

A week and a half ago I jumped in with both feet pictured on my bathroom scale, a side-view of my rather large no-longer-pregnant-yet-still-huge belly, and a drive and excitement to take on the world. 

A mid-week peak at the scale derailed my efforts. Why am I so programmed to worship the number on the scale? Why is that my indicator of health and wellness? I've read dozens of diet and lifestyle books, my friends and family have given advise, smacked me around, and tried desperately to point me in the overall health direction instead of the weightless direction, but its still an addiction I just can't ignore. 

The other addiction I struggle with is food addiction. And it's not like a controlled substance addiction. I can't simply eliminate this product, do through detox, and complete a 12-step program to rid myself of this element. Food is a needed substance. BUT... *which* foods and *how much* of those foods is what I will have to struggle with forever. 

Atkins 3/4

The train left the station going full speed yesterday. Then derailed when I remembered I had gluten free cookie dough in the fridge. The kids and I baked cookies, and my Honey and I ate raw cookie dough from the second package. Then I ate a baked cookie. Then I ate 2 more rounds of cookie dough. And I don't have a sweet tooth! Argh!!

I asked my Honey to take the rest of the dough with him to work. I won't eat the cooked cookies, they aren't as dreamy as the raw cookie dough. I also asked him to put my vino in the emergency back-up fridge in the garage. Out of sight, out of mind. 

So here we are on Tuesday morning. I've acquired a fabulous cold and have subsequently lost my voice. Awesome. I tried decaf hot tea with lemon for my morning beverage and it wasn't satisfying at all. 

Need coffee. 

Out of pods. 

This is not awesome. 

But every good addict had a backup supply. I got my hidden tub of Folgers and my Bodum press. Used the hot water from the Keurig and viola! Glorious coffee. Sugar free flavored creamer added, and I'm sipping a beautiful mug of yummy. 

The kids request waffles, but we're out of maple syrup. I offered grape jelly and they didn't want that. I got out the fresh fruit, and to my surprise neither child wanted any. Then Boo said he wanted his strawberries WARM. 

Strawberry syrup! I chopped the strawberries and put them onto a microwave safe measuring cup with a pour spout and nuked them for 45 seconds. Then poured local honey on them and smushed it all up with a fork. It was killer awesome! 

The kids wanted nothing to do with it. 

So they ate their waffles with just butter, not cut-up, they simply picked up the big round circles like toast. 

I feel an entire day of "creative parenting" ahead of us today. Hate to admit it, but I also thing it's going to be a movie day. Yeap. I'm going to let Walt Disney help babysit this Tuesday. 

Turkey Stuffed Peppers

Made stuffed bell peppers last night using ground turkey. I usually buy Jenny-O brand, but Butterball was on sale, so I bought the 3 pound "Family Size" package. Honestly, I don't like the texture of the Butterball. Not sure if it was because it was an 85/15 lean to fat ratio that was the difference, or the way that Butterball grinds their product, but something about it I didn't care for. It was almost whipped rather than ground. My Honey and both kids thought it was fantastic, so the taste wasn't an issue. 

Here's how I made it. 

3 pounds ground turkey

1 medium white onion chopped

1 Tablespoon Garlic Powder

Salt and Pepper to taste

1 teaspoon liquid smoke

4 Tablespoons Worcestershire sauce

1 can tomato sauce

1 can tomato paste

1 Cup of chopped fresh herbs. A blend from my garden of Thyme, Oregano, Flat-leaf Parsley, and Basil

2 Tablespoons Balsamic vinegar 

Sliced fresh Parmesan cheese

In a huge skillet I cooked the turkey. Then I added the onion to the meat so it would steam, soften, and flavor the meat slowly.  I added all the other ingredients at the same time and let it simmer for about an hour and a half. 

I cut the peppers in half for portion control and more surface area for yummy crispy toast bits. I sprayed the underside of the pepper halves with my olive oil spray, then loaded in the meat filling. 

I cooked them for 10 minutes in a 450 degree oven, then pulled them out, layered the fresh thinly sliced Parmesan cheese on top, then put them back in for another 10 minutes. 

The kids had the meat mixture on rolls as a sloppy joe. My Honey and I had the stuffed peppers. Everyone was VERY pleased with the outcome, and there are A LOT of leftovers. I pro only have about 2 cups of meat filling left over for more Joe's for the kids, or for a possible stuffed baked thingie using croissant dough. There are 3 pepper halves leftover too. 

Super yummy, cheap, easy, and healthy supper for the whole family. 

2 down, 78 to go.

If you followed along last week, you saw my daily struggle with healthy low calorie eating. You saw my frustrations and excitements along the way. If you're with me on Facebook, you saw my friends advice, words of wisdom, and cheers of encouragement. 

After a midweek peep at the scale, and seeing it hadn't budged, I became very sad. Friends pointed out I wasn't eating enough calories. I'm not an expert. I clearly don't understand the ins and outs (literally) of calories, or carbs, or protein, or fiber, or sodium, or fat. There are thousands of books published telling us how to eat and they all seem to contradict one another. 

But I've found that I like the low carb approach. I've had success with that in the past. It's easy, mindless, and in my mind, scientifically sound. I can't eat gluten without a slew of unpleasantries, so it's not difficult for me to bypass those choices. 

So, I find myself at the start of the week again, excited about what's to come. 2 pounds down in week one. It's not the 10-15 pound loss we see on week one of "The Biggest Looser", but I also don't have Jillian Michaels as my personal trainer and coach. 

7:30 Monday morning and the kids have had breakfast, GG's toes are painted pink just like Mommy's, the dishwasher is loaded, I'm on mug 2 of coffee with liquid sugar free flavored creamer, the dogs have been out to potty and dried off since its raining, and in a couple of hours we'll go to swim class. I still have a few loads of clean laundry to fold and put away, which I'll do while kids are napping. 

Every day is an amazing adventure. Every meal is an awesome treat. Every action is chosen. 

Didn't survive Day 5

If you've been following along, you saw that yesterday wasn't my finest hour. I think it's safe to say the granola I bought isn't gluten free. My stomach hurt all day, I was clearly grouchy and felt defeated. 

Here is my food diary from yesterday. 

Yes. I ate a whole pizza for supper. AND FELT TERRIBLE! My tummy is still fighting back from the granola and a probable case of cross-contamination in the pizza. 

So, we fall, and we pick ourselves back up. If you miss your exit, you don't stay on the highway forever do you? Nope. You find the next place to turn around and you get going again. It takes you a little longer to get there, but you don't give up the entire trip because of one wrong or missed turn. 

This isn't going to happen in a day or two. And "I" especially need to remember that. I want to see the scale move daily. I admit it. I'm a slave to the scale. Yes, I know that my clothes and my health should matter more, but there's something inside me that WANTS to see the numbers on the scale reflect my hard work. 

I'm jumping right back on. No need to wallow in my defeat or self-sabotage. Look at what works and do more of that, look at what's not working and don't do more of that, and simply plow on. 

This sucks

Pardon my French, but I'm pissed. I'm into day 5 of being a "good-girl". Watching calories and portions. Doing what society and dozens of years and doctors and scientists have said to do. I get on the scale this afternoon, and it hasn't moved. No lie. Oh, believe me I'm mad!

So, I marched downstairs, grabbed my "healthy" Greek yogurt and my "healthy" all natural granola, poured them together and ate it with a spoon. I didn't measure, but there was about a cup and a half of yogurt left in the tub, and I must have poured at least a cup of granola in there right on top. 

I didn't eat it all. Got full and my jaws started to hurt from the full onslaught of fury that came from my angry chewing. 

And, to top it off, I'm thinking that the stomach pains I was experiencing earlier in the week were from the granola, because they're back. There aren't any wheat ingredients listed, but it also doesn't say it's gluten free. 

I'm pissed! I'm still fat, now my stomach is bloated and hurting, my hormones are acting stupid, making me break-out, throwing my cycle into some freaky time-warp-system of its own, and did I mention I'm also catching a summer-time-cold, so I'm all kinds of happy and pleasant and cheerful at the moment. 

Argh! Is there no hope? No light at the end of this obese tunnel? Where, oh WHERE are the answers? Where is that winning lottery ticket that will allow me to simply get liposuction and be done with the misery of defeat?

Lord knows I've done research. Look...

I've read ALL of these. This is our kitchen table, and all of these books are ours. Everyone has an opinion, everyone is revolutionizing something, everyone is thinking outside of the box. 

The only one I have ever had success with is Atkins. In my late 20's I lost 60 pounds following a low-carb-lifestyle. And honestly, the reason I'm so heavy today is because I ate like a jackass when I was pregnant. 

But if you say "Atkins" out-loud you're shunned! "Oh my GOD! That's so unhealthy! That diet is terrible for you!"

No two bodies are the same. No two people will gain or lose the same. Finding what works for us is what matters. And this low-calorie shit is simply NOT WORKING for me. So the hunt is still on. I don't like how I feel right now. I'm grumpy, bloated, and my tummy hurts. 

I'm going to go curl up in bed and play Candy Crush. 

Day 4

Day 4 was cool because I used one of those diet tips I've heard about and always thought was hooey. Around 3:00 I was "STARVING"! I logged the snack I wanted to have, Greek yogurt and granola, and it was around 300 calories! For a "healthy" snack, that is "chock-full of protein and whole grains which fill you up and make you feel great all day". Bologna!!  Pure bologna. No. What fills me up and makes ME feel great all day is a cheeseburger and fries. 

So while I was contemplating my choices, I thought about the HALT method.  "H" - Am I HUNGRY? = YES! "A" - Am I ANGRY? = YES, because I want a cheeseburger. "L" - Am I lonely? = NO, I have 2 kids, 2 dogs, a cat and Facebook to keep me company. "T" - Am I THIRSTY?  = Hum... Could be. Lets drink a bunch of water to see if it really does "fill you up" when you're feeling snackish. 

Well, I'll be damned! It worked. I drank around 16 ounces of water with lemon, and I didn't even have to get up. I had my water bottle already with me. Here's my food log from day 4. 

I then proceeded to pack up the kids and (almost) all their supplies for swimming class. I let the dog out, and we went to class. 

Swim class was fun. GG "graduated" up to level 3, Boo almost went to level 4, but needs to enter the water with a swooping/diving motion from the edge of the pool, rather than dropping in feet first. 

GG got to ring the graduation bell, she didn't force me to come in to remove her from the pool like she has every other class, and we had a moderately tantrum-free suit removal, dry-off, and redressing in street clothes. Right up until I realized I had forgotten a shirt for Boo. Seriously Carter Ann? Seriously?!? Great. Do I have him walk out in just his blue jeans and no shirt and act like its no big deal, do I leave him in his swimsuit, because that's a more socially acceptable shirtless outfit? The whole time he's sassing me to no end because I forgot his shirt. Since he's already in his jeans at this point, I'm not going to put my sweet angel back in his cold wet suit, so I wrapped his top half in his towel, and we walked out like that. 

Just to see that it was POURING outside. And the umbrellas are in the car. And the car is in the far corner of the lot. Seriously? I forgot the shirt, I forgot the umbrellas. Ggrrrr.  

With GG on hip, purse and gigantic pool bag on shoulder, and Boo holding my hand, we run to the car. Boo loses a flip-flop in the parking lot, so we have to go back, put on said flop, and run to car again. I put GG in her seat, Boo crawls through, I shut GG's door, go around to Boo's seat, use the towel to cover my head and back while I buckle him in. I jump into the front seat and start the car. 

Boo is still smart-mouthing me for forgetting his shirt. He's "FREEZING" because he doesn't have his shirt. Note, he's the most dry of the 3 of us because he was wrapped in his towel. I tossed the now wet towel back to him telling him its cold and wet, but he's convinced I'm completely wrong. Then GG wants HER towel. "NO", I said, and I backed out of the parking spot. Got to the stop sign and heard, "Mommy, I'm not buckled." I turn and look, and sure as shit, I didn't buckle GG. 

Put the car in reverse, get out of the way as I can, car in park, jump out, run around, open her door, buckle her in while she's screaming and kicking because she doesn't WANT to be buckled, close her door, run back around car, get back in driver seat, and drive home. 

We walk in the door to find the Daddy person getting out the vacuum. "YOUR DOG ate the trash again." I didn't dare ask what he was using the Dyson for in this case instead of sweeping and mopping. Nope. Don't question at this point. Whatever he's doing is perfect. 

"Stella was outside when I got home too", he says after the vacuum is off. I looked down at the 85 pound collie shepherd chow retriever mixed mutt who is sadly glaring at me through her still wet, very long, very thick fur with eyes that say, "Mommy... You left me outside in the rain and I was so scared you would never come home."

Forgot shirt and umbrellas. Forgot to place trash can in bathroom, forgot to buckle daughter, forgot fuzzy-girl outside. 

Perhaps I should sit down. But no. Instead I'm going to go change out of my soaking wet clothes. 

GG and I change out of our wet clothes into our jammies and bring jammies down for the boys. What's better on a crazy night of the forgetsies than a family movie night in jammies? 

The kids had fish-sticks, veggie-noodle Mac-N-Cheese, grapes, cheese, milk and water. Mommy and Daddy had grilled salmon. We watched The Rise of The Guardians, and forgot all about the rest of the day. 

Day 3

Yesterday was easier than I thought when I started writing in the wee hours of the morning. 

The hardest part of yesterday was deciding what to order from the Chinese take-out/delivery place. My Honey wanted delivery, and I couldn't find the menu for the Italian place that makes the HUGE salads. So we opted for Chinese. I searched my ap for different options and their calorie content, then went to google to check ingredients to be sure what I was picking would most likely be gluten free. 

I chose Moo Shu Pork, and asked for steamed white rice rather than the pancakes. It was VERY good. I didn't eat it all. I could have, and a part of me wanted to! But I realized I wasn't stuffed, nor was I still hungry, so I stopped. There was enough left for a snack later, but I threw it away. I don't HAVE to clean my plate. I don't have to save every bite of leftovers. 

My exercising was pushed back to the kids nap-time, and I LOVED that time alone. I read my book and enjoyed the "quiet". I even rode longer than the 30 minutes because I was so happily enjoying the book and the activity as a whole. 

I am having some abdominal pains as my body gets adjusted to eating differently. I hope this is temporary, and hope its a normal part of this cycle. 

Here's what I ate, drake, and did for exercise yesterday. I didn't add the time playing with the kids, the number of outfit changes they wanted, the dozens of puzzles, markers, crayons, and books I picked up off the floor, and didn't count the vacuuming in my activities. 

 

(Please feel free to take a look at a fellow Mom-Blogger's page. www.TinyStepsMommy.com) 

Day 2

Here are the screen shots from my food and exercise journal from day 2. I spent about a half hour or 45 minutes playing at the playground with the kids, but couldn't find an activity to log those calories burned. I'm sure swinging burns calories. You use every muscle to swing yourself. And holding 30 pounds over your head as the kids practice on the monkey bars, that burned some calories and built strength. 

I'm writing this on the morning of day 3, and I'm still in bed, I'm HUNGRY, the kids are still sleeping, and its not quite 6:00am yet. I'm already coming up with excuses to not workout this morning. My shoulder and neck hurt. It's not a good idea to exercise when injured. I'm catching my daughters cold, it's not smart to exercise when you're not 100%. I need to rest, my body is telling me its time to slow down and take a rest day. 

We'll see what today unfolds. No promises other than just taking it every bite at a time. 

Day 1 of A New Life

Just a few things "new" started yesterday. 1) I'm home full time with the kids again. 2) The kids are starting swim classes tonight. 3) We started attending the local museum for weekly themed preschool age kids. 4) I announced my personal struggle with my weight and my frustrations with the difficulties in "dieting".

So this morning I woke up at 6:00 and hopped on the stationary bike and had a very nice 30 minute ride while watching the news. My son woke up and stumbled his way to Mommy-Daddy-Room with his trusty stuffed lamb, and climbed onto the bed to see what I was doing. He was so interested in it. To him it looked like I was playing. He asked if he could do it when he got bigger, and that was suddenly the motivation and excitement I needed to plow on through the 30 minutes. 

I felt FANTASTIC after my early morning cardio. Proud, excited, energized, and excited. Awesome. 

So, my food diary from Monday:

Breakfast- Multivitamin, 2 cups of coffee with Atkins French Vanilla shake added as my sweetener and creamer. 

Lunch- 1 Cup of homemade purple cabbage coleslaw made with a "light" slaw dressing.  1 light baby bell cheese circle. 1 banana, sliced in a bowl, with 1 tablespoon natural peanut butter drizzled over it, 1/2 cup nonfat plain yogurt and a Truvia packet sprinkled on top. Huge cup of water. 

Supper- Salmon, pan-seared in a little olive oil, corn on the cob, grilled with a little canola oil and salt, purple cabbage slaw with light slaw dressing, and 4 glasses of wine. Yes ... 4. Ugh. I don't feel great this morning after drinking 4 glasses of wine. I was so excited about my calories because I was so far under my daily goal, I kept logging and seeing that I had more room for another glass. 

Today's goal will be to EAT my calories. Drinking my calories is not fun, not smart, and not healthy. 

Role Mother

The infamous scale. Sorry friend, it's not your fault. 

The moment of truth. 

Yes. That's 230, smack on the dot. I like round numbers. (Insert appropriate fat joke here.) 

Lets see what we're really working with here. 

Enter our leading lady. She's 39. The mother of 2, aged 4 and 3. The wife of 1, aged 41. 

Waist: 49

Chest: 47.5

Hips: 53

R Thigh: 29.5

L Thigh: 30

R Bicep: 13.5

L Bicep: 14

Every moment of every day, we are making hundreds if not thousands of choices. These choices mold who we are, who we become, and who we stay. 

As you can see from the pictures above, my choices involved eating more calories than I needed. I chose a sedentary lifestyle, and I chose to eat and drink foods high in calories. 

Now, the thing is, I'm not a candy bar and potato chip girl. I'm a seconds and thirds girl. I'd rather have another grilled chicken breast than a dessert. About a year ago I noticed I have a gluten intolerance, so I'm not eating pasta at every meal, breakfast isn't stacks of chocolate chip pancakes, and lunch is no longer a stop at McDonalds every day. Don't get me wrong. I'm so addicted to food that I will put up with the stomach pains, the immediate need to run to the restroom, the joint pain, and the irritability that come along with even the tiniest bit of gluten present in what I eat. Just this week I braved the onslaught and feasted on a Double Quarter with Cheese, Large Fries, and a Large Diet Coke. Within 15 or so minutes, I began to regret my CHOICE. 

So what choices will I make to get me out of this current state? I'm not happy being overweight. I look at pictures of me before the kids were born, where I'm a size 8/10, and I wonder how overnight it all changed. But then I look at my 3 and 4 year olds, and I know it wasn't overnight at all. It is simply the result of almost 5 years of bad food, drink, portion size, and lifestyle choices. 

Logic seems to dictate that by making different choices, the outcome will also be different. 

It won't happen overnight, and that's going to be hard for me. I'm an immediate gratification kind of girl. That's one reason I'm putting this in writing. And I'm not thinking of this as a diet. I've failed at every diet on the market, other than when I was in my late 20's and lost 60 pounds following a low carb eating plan. 

This is like any other addiction. It's one moment, one hour, one bite at a time. Will I CHOOSE to sit in front of the TV? Yeah. I will. But I'll also CHOOSE for how long. Will I CHOOSE to wake up early to ride my stationary bike and watch the morning news before the kids get up? I did today, and it was awesome. Will I CHOOSE to remember that feeling tomorrow morning at 6:00am?  I honestly don't know. I really hope I do. Will I CHOOSE to continue to experiment with cooking awesome foods and creating new dishes? YES! But I'm also going to CHOOSE how much of it I eat and drink. 

Every moment we make dozens of choices. I hope the choices I make will inspire my children in every aspect of their lives. Not just with nutrition and exercise, but with being a great person too.